re:mote voices

Title: Kill Bill: Vol. 1
Cast: Uma Thurman, Lucy Liu, Vivica A. Fox, Daryl Hannah, David Carradine, Michael Madsen, Chiaki Kuriyama, Sonny Chiba
Director: Quentin Tarantino

As he is keen to accept the blame, let us point fingers. Kill Bill is Quentin Tarantino's fourth film. The self-important manner that this is stated at the start of the film counts as all the bad omen I should have needed. It is fair to say that I have never been one of those fan boys reduced to a gaga state at the mention of Tarantino. Reservoir Dogs and Pulp Fiction were ok, I guess. Jackie Brown had sufficient appeal that I didn't even bother.

So with that in mind why did I bother with Kill Bill? Well I guess the trailer looked pretty good. On reflection though I suggest sticking with the trailer - which is action packed, slick and impressive. Unlike the film, which is lamentably self-indulgent, taking self-indulgence to a whole new masturbatory level.

It doesn't take long before I am cringing with every scene, discounting that declaration of responsibility. Uma Thurman plays part of an assassination team who seem to work for a man called Bill, except that four years ago she was betrayed and left in a coma from the beating delivered by the other team members. The first main scene post-titles is a confrontation, which leads to the first dialogue of the film. The words exchanged by these women are incredibly stilted and like the rest of the film contrived and unconvincing. Which is to say, just plain wrong!

A film with this much detail and attention given should be celebrated. In other circumstances it is the kind of thing I would savour on reflection. But the detail is so deliberate and self-conscious that it attains a level of “look at me” that surpasses any level of what might be called subtlety. The result, like the dialogue is that I have to resist the reflex urge to choke on every second of film.

Through out the film I am filled with a feeling of incredulous disbelief, how can a film about cool female assassins and samurai sword fighting be this bad? The action seems to be clunky a lot of the time, more concerned about relishing the excessive gore – fountaining blood that doesn’t shock, but rather bores – oh here he goes again, again with the blood, will he ever get tired of this schlock? At least one thing that can be said about the scene where Uma massacres a bunch of ninja - it isn’t made to look as though no one is getting hurt, this is a bloody massacre and there is no getting away from that.

As with previous efforts Tarantino plays around with narrative. With which he manages to destroy any sense of tension or suspense that the narrative might have had if he had just got on with it. There are certain events in the film which if you don’t know how they turn out then you probably weren’t paying very much attention or aren’t very bright.

The level of Tarantino’s onanistic conceit is such that Kill Bill is an epic. So much so, that in the end it was cut into two films. After spending far too long trying not to scream out, while repeating the mantra “fucking hell”, I think it is safe to say that I do not wish to witness the remains of this cinematic atrocity.